Pretty Amazing Grace!

I love the song 'Pretty Amazing Grace' by Neil Diamond. It’s from his album 'Home Before Dark'. I was reminded of it when a friend posted a link on Facebook and as a result, I spent my journey into work one morning listening to all of the album again. I think it’s a great piece of work. Something I can chill out to and get a lot of strength from at the same time. Weird really, as it can also be quite emotional.

So there I am, sat on the train and my mind starts to wander and I realised I did it! After so many years! How amazing is that? Let me explain what I mean.

About six years ago, I made my first tentative steps into the real world as Grace. My friend Sue was so supportive and made sure I was okay throughout the day. I had a fabulous time out in London and we met other friends who we knew through the Angels Forum. We had a meal and a few drinks, and then walked through the West End, down to the river, before heading home.

First time out as Grace

This was a big point in my life, but I remember thinking how normal it all felt, how uneventful and how odd that the world did not come to an end as a result. I was really sad that the day had to end.

You would think there would be no stopping me after that. Life however, got in the way. For reasons I wont go into now, this might have been the only chance for Grace and the world to get to know each other. It seemed only fair let my hair down, just a little. I realise now, as much as this was a major milestone in my life, it wasn't the right time to be more out there. In my life at that time I had responsibilities as a parent and partner. I wasn't ready either, as much as I would have liked to be.

If you want to know about the day, take a look at my old blog State of Grace

It would take another six years before I ventured out again. This time I was as ready as I could be. The need to live more authentically was much more real and I had help working through that from a Trans counselling service. I knew there would be challenges ahead and I will say more about that another time. Now though, back to going out again, adding another first as it would be on my own! Nervous would be an understatement, but it would be a turning point in getting out there and the last year has been an amazing time for me socially, with old friends accepting this side to me and making new friends too.

Back in the real world

Now that I have got back to writing here, its time to share some the things that have happened since. There will be a lot of positive things and occasionally some lows. I've done a lot the last year or so and ticked a lot off my to do list. So much really, that it's time to take stock and look at what's ahead. Where to go from here? Hmmm decisions, decisions.